Hey! I’m Heca, and I’m here to blog about anything that catches your eye- or stuff that doesn’t. Just so you know, I’m on fanfiction.net as Hecatenna, and on dA as watergirl2000. I love to eat chocolate (what girl doesn’t?) and read. I draw a bunch as well- almost obsessively I don’t expect this blog to become very popular- I mean, no one knows who I am, but I can be optimistic. Anyway, the topic of the day is Romeo and Juliet.
Romeo and Juliet is a play by William Shakespeare, a tragic love story, and apparently a masterpiece. My class is reading it in English, and I honestly believe I have never read more crap in my life. I mean, really? The whole ‘I would die for you’ thing is cute. The problem is Romeo and Juliet have known each other for about- wait for it- three days! They kill themselves in the sake of love, despite knowing each other for only three freaking days. You may not agree with me, and that’s okay. But hear me out.
The first scenes start with Romeo pining over a girl named Rosaline. Romeo claims to be so in love with her that he will never love another girl. Romeo’s friend Benvolio insists that he will meet another girl, one that will love him back. Romeo talks about how upset and suicidal he is, but finally the two decide to crash a Capulet party. For Benvolio to check out the hot chicks, and for Romeo because Rosaline is going to be there. Sure enough, Romeo goes to the party. It’s there that he sees Juliet for the first time. After seeing her Romeo immediately forgets about Rosaline, and walks over to Juliet. Some bad pick up lines later Romeo has kissed Juliet. On the mouth. Twice. Let’s remind each other that Juliet is thirteen. Romeo is probably somewhere around eighteen, and they are in love. Juliet has never actually thought about marriage, or boys before but now she sees Romeo and her hormones are going crazy. It’s a teenage problem, but worse since the two families hate each other, and talk about killing each other frequently.
Romeo is over Rosaline (even though he loved her a few hours ago) and is really into Juliet. So much, in fact, that instead of going home like he should after partying Romeo sneaks into the Capulet garden and starts wondering if Juliet loves him. Of course, Juliet’s balcony is right above him as he soon realizes. Juliet goes off on a speel about how she loves Romeo, and Romeo is so overwhelmed he lets Juliet know he is right underneath her, watching her in her nightgown.
Wait, rewind this into modern times. Ben (Romeo) has been partying all night and has had a one night (one minute?) stand with Julie (Juliet). Instead of leaving a drunken Ben goes to Julie’s house and watches as she lounges on her balcony. Oh, wait, we forgot to mention that Julie is a tank and shorts. She is also thirteen. We now know that Ben would be considered a pervert and a stalker in our times- but in Romeo and Juliet he is a gentleman, a true lover. Oh yes. If Romeo showed up on my porch I would punch him in the face, hard.
So we are at the balcony, and Romeo proposes to Juliet. That’s right, he asked a thirteen year old girl to marry him, a legal adult in our day and age. But he’s not pedophiliac they’re really in love. Sure.
The fact that Juliet accepts his proposal makes me want to cry. Have a backbone! Jeesh.
Trouble follows the newly weds (yes, they get married and actually consumate the marriage. You know, like sleeping with Romeo. JUliet, a thirteen year old girl sleeps with a legal adult.) Romeo kills Juliet’s cousin, and instead of being upset Juliet forgives Romeo. She learns of his banishment and goes to Friar Lawrence, threatening to kill herself if he can’t fix things for her in time.
To top it off the friar concocts this doomed plan, in which Juliet will pretend to be dead. Romeo will know of this before hand, and will come for her. She will wake up in her family’s tomb and he will be there for her. They will not be missed, and they will run off to Mantua.
Now, why couldn’t they have done that without the whole drama thing? They didn’t need t have Juliet pretend she was dead, and her whole messenger thing to Romeo was a bad idea to begin with. Telling someone that you have a elaborate plan in which you pretend to die is clearly something you tell them in person. And besides, they didn’t need Juliet to pretend she was dead.
I honestly think Romeo and Juliet were never in love in the first place.